Hopes & Dreams
by Sexy.Lil.Emo
Summary: Jim has a nightmare about Spock. Spock demonstrates in a very human way that he eternally belongs with Kirk. Sequel to 'Chances & Mistakes'. Spirk. TOS.


Hey guys, so here is the sequel I spoke about for 'Chances & Mistakes' it isn't entirely necessary to read it first, but it probably gives some context.

I'll put Vulcan translations at the end (although you may know most or all of them)

hope you enjoy it, much love xox

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Captain Kirk tossed and turned in his big empty bed. The covers were twisted in a mess around him and damp with sweat.

Captain Kirk was having a nightmare.

It wasn't a regular occurrence, but when it happened they were bad and usually when Spock was on duty.

This one in particular was about the Vulcan himself. Jim was searching for him and couldn't find him anywhere, there were so many doors and so many people but none of them were Spock. He opened another door and someone whispered "He's undergoing Kolinahr" and soon it was a chorus through the room. He slammed the door and kept searching.

Meanwhile on the bridge of the Enterprise, Spock was sitting in the Captain's chair. Everything was running smoothly and Spock was checking some reports on his PADD.

He looked up suddenly as if startled, he could feel Jim's discomfort and fear through the bond they shared that linked their minds. He heard the word "Kolinahr" float through their connection and knew Jim was having a nightmare. He frowned.

"Are you alright, Mr Spock?" Uhura asked from her seat at the communications section; she had noticed his sudden change.

"Yes, thank you Lieutenant. I must make a quick trip to the Captain, something has come to my attention. I shall return shortly, Mr Sulu, you have the conn."

Sulu acknowledged as Spock left the chair and took the turbo lift down to the Captain's (and his own) quarters.

He walked the corridor as though he weren't eager to reach Jim and sooth him of his nightmare. He greeted crew as he walked passed them and finally made it to the door of the Captain's quarters. Spock entered the code and went through the doors; he found his bondmate in bed still asleep but twisted up in the covers, one leg hanging off the bed. His eyes were screwed up and he was moaning quietly in a way that Spock knew was certainly not pleasure.

"Oh, Jim." Spock whispered, it hurt him to see Jim in such a way. He knelt on the bed next to Kirk and touched his fingers to the meld points on his head, he sent feelings of calmness and safety and love through their bond.

Slowly Jim eased out of the nightmare and awoke to find Spock next to him on the bed. Wordlessly, he wrapped his arms around Spock and put his head on the Vulcan's chest. Spock pressed a kiss to Jim's hair.

It was not the first nightmare Jim had had about Spock leaving; it saddened Spock that even years later Jim was still effected by Spock's mistake.

He let them stay in that position for a few minutes "I regret to say this but my shift has not ended, I must return to the bridge and you must get some more restful sleep."

"Thank you, Spock. You're always there when I need you." Jim smiled sleepily.

It warmed Spock inside to see Jim smile like that after such a nightmare "When my shift is over, meet me on observation deck B, I have something for you." His hand brushed over the pocket of his trousers.

"I can't wait." Jim snuggled into Spock's pillow. Spock petted his hair, finger brushing a meld point to help Jim sleep easier. Once the Captain was asleep Spock returned to the bridge, eagerly and anxiously awaiting the end of shift. Five point three eight hours to go.

XXX

Jim made himself comfortable on one of the seats in observation deck B, he had many to choose from as he was the only one there. He pulled out the book and glasses he had brought with him and began to read; he loved to read old Earth novels and this was the latest one Spock had found and given to him as an early anniversary gift.

He idly wondered what Spock had to give him, and how he had been there to ease Jim out of his nightmare. That time of his life had been one of the worst, he was not surprised that his subconscious still played on it but he wished it wouldn't.

Jim realised he had read the same line three times and put the book down and took his glasses off to rub his eyes. Spock should be there soon, shift was due to change, which meant Jim had eight hours before he was due on the bridge.

The stars looked beautiful as they flew past the window, it was something he often enjoyed to watch, he presumed that's why Spock chose this location.

It was then that the doors opened and his first officer strode through.

Jim turned in his seat "Tonk'peh ashaya. How was shift?" Jim held out his fingers for a Vulcan kiss and tilted his head for a human kiss.

Spock moved straight over to his bondmate and reciprocated both kisses "Hello my Jim. It went relatively smoothly apart from your nightmare, how're you feeling?" He still had some concern over it.

Jim smiled "I am fine Spock, I assure you, it was just a bad dream." He knew Spock would be worried about him but there was no need, he knew where Spock's true heart lied now and that he wouldn't leave again. "I know you're not going anywhere."

"Good, I do not wish for you to have such dreams, especially about myself." Spock hesitated at the end of his sentence.

"What's on your mind, Spock?" Jim asked as he caressed Spock's right cheek with his hand. "You asked me here for a reason."

Spock's features soften at Jim's touch "I-yes I did, however I find that now I am here I am nervous. I had intended to do this on the shore leave we have planned in three weeks time. In light of your bad dream, I wish to do this now to demonstrate my eternal commitment to you."

"Oh?" Jim was a little taken aback by how serious this was, he had not expected this.

Spock knelt on one knee in front of Jim and decided he suddenly didn't like the speech he had memorised. He opened their bond and dropped many shields to allow for more transference from one to the other.

"Oh my- Spock." Jim whispered, he could feel everything Spock was feeling and it was beautiful, he was going to cry.

Spock took Jim's hands in his own (partly to stop them shaking) and tried a human thing; he spoke from the heart "James Tiberius Kirk, for many years we cultivated a friendship, a very special one, a friendship I had never known or knew I wanted and needed. I was foolish to betray that friendship and hurt you in the way I did, for that I could never be more sorry. It has been my mission every day since I returned to ensure you know you are loved and treasured, to treat you as the gift you are in my life and to never take a moment with you for granted again. I promise to never leave you again, I am eternally yours k'hat'n'dlawa. Jim, would you honour me in becoming my husband?" Spock let go of Jim's hands to pull out a small box, he opened it and showed Jim the ring that lay inside.

Jim listened to every word as silent tears began to roll down his face, the bond was so open and poured so much love through, and the words Spock spoke were so filled with meaning and truth. He sat for a instant, a huge grin splitting his face and took in the moment.

He apparently took too long however because Spock's nerves crept in (and why was Jim crying?) "Did-did I do it wrong? You appear to be crying…I read up on this human tradition very well before attempting it, I wanted to do it right for you-"

Jim stopped his rambling with a kiss, it was almost electric.

One word echoed through their bond "Yes!"

"Yes, Spock, a million times yes! Yes you did it right, yes I will be honoured to be your husband, yes, Taluhk nash-veh k'dular." Jim's heart was soaring; this was one of the best moments of his life. He holds out his left hand for Spock to put the ring on him.

Spock's entire being is ecstatic, logically there was no reason for Jim to decline, love was illogical however (humans too). "I am overjoyed at your acceptance and enthusiastic reaction, I still do not understand the tears though." He pulls the ring from the box and slid it onto the ring finger of Jim's left hand, he then kissed it once in place. "Parted from me and never parted." He whispered.

"I can feel your emotions, your love, Spock, and they're beautiful. Do not be worried k'diwa, they are tears of joy." Jim watches Spock place the ring upon his finger and hears the familiar words "Never and always touching and touched." He finished smiling. He brings his hand up to inspect the ring closer.

"It is made of Vulcan steel and is very tough. When I spoke to my mother before my return she gave it to me, she had it made when I was young, for me to give to my the person I bonded to. However it did not feel the right time on the night I returned and even when our bonding ceremony took place I did not think it was the correct time, but I know now why. My mother is a wise woman." Spock explains in greater detail than he meant to. "I also made an engraving."

Jim slid the ring back off of his finger and found what he recognised as Vulcan calligraphy on the inside of the ring. "It is stunning, what does it say?"

"T'hy'la." Spock told him simply but lovingly.

Jim replaced the ring on his finger and looked at Spock with adoring eyes "Wani ra yana ro aisha S'chn T'gai Spock."

Spock gave a genuine smile "As I love you Jim Kirk."

Jim pulled Spock up into a deep kiss, and there they stayed for long minutes, lost in each other and the love they had found. It was more than either of them had ever hoped for.

The stars continued to pass by.

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Thank you for reading, leave a review if you enjoyed it :)

Vulcan Translations:

Tonk'peh = Hello

Ashaya = Love

k'hat'n'dlawa = Half of each other's heart and soul

Taluhk nash-veh k'dular = I cherish thee

K'diwa = Beloved (shortened k'hat'n'dlawa)

Wani ra yana ro aisha = I love you


End file.
